#LXD rewrite 2023 #1278

sspencerwire · 2023-06-20T00:14:07Z

remove passive voice
bullet items have periods ONLY when there is a qualifying sentence included within the bullet item
simplify word usag
use sentence style capitalization on headings
remove mention of iptables in the TOC document
remove iptables instructions from the firewall document

Author checklist (Completed by original Author)

Good fit for the Rocky Linux project? Title and Author Metatags inserted ?
If applicable, steps and instructions have been tested to work
Initial self-review to fix basic typos and grammar completed

Rocky Documentation checklist (Completed by Rocky team)

1st Pass (Document is good fit for project and author checklist completed)
2nd Pass (Technical Review - check for technical correctness)
3rd Pass (Detailed Editorial Review and Peer Review)
Final approval (Final Review)

* remove passive voice * bullet items have periods ONLY when there is a qualifying sentence included within the bullet item * simplify word usag * use sentence style capitalization on headings * remove mention of `iptables` in the TOC document * remove `iptables` instructions from the firewall document

sspencerwire · 2023-06-20T13:28:26Z

I took on this project as part of the documentation rewrite and cleanup routines. Some of the highlights here are the removal of iptables as an option for the firewall, rewording to remove passive voice, removing punctuation for bullet items except where they also include a qualifying sentence, word and sentence simplification where possible. It's ready for review. I did review it within mkdocs and it seems to look OK there as well.

EzequielBruni

Only found a few small things that you might want to change, but otherwise I think it's all good.

EzequielBruni · 2023-06-20T21:11:46Z

docs/books/lxd_server/01-install.md


-LXD must be installed from a snap for Rocky Linux. For this reason, we need to install `snapd` (and a few other useful programs) with:
+LXD installation is from a snap on Rocky Linux. For this reason, you need to install `snapd` (and a few other useful programs) with:


Might want to go with, "requires a snap package" rather than "is from a snap". It's just a tiny bit more precise.

Thanks @EzequielBruni I've integrated all of your suggestions. I appreciate the review!

EzequielBruni · 2023-06-20T21:20:29Z

docs/books/lxd_server/02-zfs_setup.md


 First, enter this command:

 ```
 /sbin/modprobe zfs
 ```

-This should not return an error, it should simply return to the command prompt when done. If you get an error, stop now and begin troubleshooting. Again, make sure that secure boot is off as that will be the most likely culprit.
+If no errors, it will return to the prompt and echo nothing. If you get an error, stop now and begin troubleshooting. Again, ensure that secure boot is off. That will be the most likely culprit.


Maybe go with, "If there are no errors,"

EzequielBruni · 2023-06-20T21:59:20Z

docs/books/lxd_server/04-firewall.md

-## Firewall Set Up - firewalld
-
-For _firewalld_ rules, we need to use [this basic procedure](../../guides/security/firewalld.md) or be familiar with those concepts. Our assumptions are the same as with the _iptables_ rules above: LAN network of 192.168.1.0/24 and a bridge named lxdbr0. To be clear, you might have multiple interfaces on your LXD server, with one perhaps facing your WAN as well. We are also going to create a zone for the bridged and local networks. This is just for zone clarity sake, as the other names do not really apply. The below assumes that you already know the basics of _firewalld_.
+For _firewalld_ rules, you need to use [this basic procedure](../../guides/security/firewalld.md) or be familiar with those concepts. Our assumptions are: LAN network of 192.168.1.0/24 and a bridge named lxdbr0. To be clear, you might have many interfaces on your LXD server, with one perhaps facing your WAN. You are also going to create a zone for the bridged and local networks. This is just for zone clarity sake. The other zone names do not really apply. This procedure assumes that you already know the basics of _firewalld_.


* clarity's sake

EzequielBruni · 2023-06-20T22:05:41Z

docs/books/lxd_server/05-lxd_images.md


-Once you have your server environment set up, you'll probably be itching to get started with a container. There are a _lot_ of container OS possibilities. To get a feel for how many possibilities, enter this command:
+You are probably can not wait to get started with a container. There are a many container operating system possibilities. To get a feel for how many possibilities, enter this command:


Remove the "are" from "You are"

EzequielBruni · 2023-06-20T22:06:42Z

docs/books/lxd_server/05-lxd_images.md


 ```
 lxc launch images:rockylinux/8 rockylinux-test-8
 ```

-That will create a Rocky Linux-based container named "rockylinux-test-8". You can rename a container after it has been created, but you first need to stop the container, which starts automatically when it is launched.
+That will create a Rocky Linux-based container named "rockylinux-test-8". You can rename a container after creating it, but you first need to stop the container, which starts automatically when launched.


* "starts automatically when created", maybe?

EzequielBruni · 2023-06-20T22:08:05Z

docs/books/lxd_server/05-lxd_images.md


 ```
 lxc stop rockylinux-test-8
 ```

-Then simply move the container to a new name:
+Move the container to a different name:


Maybe... "Use the move command to change the container's name."

EzequielBruni · 2023-06-20T22:22:47Z

docs/books/lxd_server/08-snapshots.md


-The author used LXD containers for PowerDNS public facing servers, and the process of updating those applications became so much more worry-free, since you can snapshot the container first before continuing.
+The author used LXD containers for PowerDNS public facing servers, and the process of updating those applications became less worrisome, because of taking a snapshot of the container first before continuing.


"because of taking a snapshot of the container first before continuing" could be more simply phrased as "thanks to taking snapshots before every update"

github-actions · 2023-06-20T23:16:51Z

Test results for 0b4ff55:

Number of broken URLs: 0

URL,RESULT,FILENAME

sspencerwire marked this pull request as draft June 20, 2023 00:14

sspencerwire requested review from EzequielBruni and wsoyinka June 20, 2023 13:17

sspencerwire marked this pull request as ready for review June 20, 2023 13:28

sspencerwire added 2 commits June 20, 2023 12:34

fix wording

cfbf42f

Wording changes

1d43084

EzequielBruni reviewed Jun 20, 2023

View reviewed changes

Wording changes from @EzequielB

0b4ff55

sspencerwire merged commit 99060f5 into rocky-linux:main Jun 20, 2023

sspencerwire deleted the WIP_lxd_rewrite_2023 branch July 20, 2023 14:05

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		LXD must be installed from a snap for Rocky Linux. For this reason, we need to install `snapd` (and a few other useful programs) with:
		LXD installation is from a snap on Rocky Linux. For this reason, you need to install `snapd` (and a few other useful programs) with:


		Once you have your server environment set up, you'll probably be itching to get started with a container. There are a _lot_ of container OS possibilities. To get a feel for how many possibilities, enter this command:
		You are probably can not wait to get started with a container. There are a many container operating system possibilities. To get a feel for how many possibilities, enter this command:


		The author used LXD containers for PowerDNS public facing servers, and the process of updating those applications became so much more worry-free, since you can snapshot the container first before continuing.
		The author used LXD containers for PowerDNS public facing servers, and the process of updating those applications became less worrisome, because of taking a snapshot of the container first before continuing.

#LXD rewrite 2023 #1278

#LXD rewrite 2023 #1278

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